Today was my dads 70th birthday a huge one and I wish we were there to celebrate it with him. It is also Betty's birthday as well and my heart goes out to Tracy and Margie and their little families. I'm so glad that I went out to Saskatchewan when they planned the surprise party for them both. Just a lesson in we really never know what is going to happen so make memories along the way. Alin and I are planning on taking his parents and my parents to Dominican next Feb we just haven't told them yet. For my parents 70ths and Alins moms 65. Will take them at different times so they can spend as much time with the kids as possible. We called dad and the kids say Happy Birthday to him a lot. I do wish we lived closer to them and the rest of the family. They talk about their cousins all the time and think we should just be able to go see Torrance, Keston, Lincoln, Christian...anytime. I'm sure glad they have a lot of fun together when we are together.
Now on to the nitty gritty of the day, I've been trying to exercise which isn't going well at all with 3 little ones someone always needs me, right now, so Alin and I had talked about it and decided that every second Monday and Tuesday morning I would be able to go downstairs and exercise. When I went into our bedroom to get him up, he was annoyed and I instantly became frustrated. First because I just needed 28 min and second because I felt like he doesn't acknowledge that occasionally I need some time to my self to take care of me and my body. I was hurt and a thousand thoughts ran through my mind... I never complain when he has guy nights at the movies or other things so I just felt defeated, unappreciated and frustrated that I have all this weight to lose and don't have a second to lose it. Plus the sleep thing, he 98% of the time goes back to bed in the morning or has a nap with the kids or falls asleep with them, while I'm still going...doing dishes, laundry, and all the rest of mom stuff after I've been up with Abbie about 4 or 5 times and still nursing which is exhausting and draining. Not proud to admit but it got ugly we were both so frustrated, tired and probably both feeling under appreciated. The kids could tell I was upset while I was folding clothes in our bedroom and when they came into see me would start crying and day I don't want mom to be sad. It didn't get better from there I wanted to figure things out and Alin didn't want to talk about it. By the time 11 am rolled around everyone was upset and crying and it was HORRIBLE!!! I told Alin that we needed to talk in the bedroom away from the kids, so we put a movie on and we came and talked. It got figured out and I think what we both needed to hear was that we loved each other, that we were both tired and that we appreciated each other. Sometimes in the busyness of 3 kids 3 and under we need to stop and give each other a hug and a real kiss, not one of the quick pecks on the cheek but a tnought long smooch and squeeze. I apologized to the kids and we explained that moms and dads argue but they still love each other and them. It was super mello after.
After Alin went to work the kids and I went grocery shopping... My feelings were already tender and while waiting in line she turned around to me and said " I guess you don't believe in negative population" at first I was thinking is she really taking to me and then she continued " it's when you don't have more than one kid" I laughed a little nervously and just said well 3 was just too much fun, when she looked at me and her voice dripping with sarcasm " ya looks like fun" I could feel tears start to form and she continued to be rude with her comments. I could see the young girl teller trying to push her groceries thru fast and look at me in sympathy and then she was gone. The young Muslim girl started to visit with me, talk to the kids ask them their name and by the time she was down with my groceries her kindness had calmed me down. I went out snuggled my three and told them I loved them and secretly hoped the lady tripped on the way home. I know not very kind but these are my loves your talking about.
I was thinking about this comment I heard and it seemed to fit today to a T. "Remember it's a bad day, not a bad life"
When I got home and later that evening after kids were in bed and I was doing dishes I listened to a talk by President Uchdorf "of regrets and resolutions" from conference oct. 2012