October 22,2014 CHOICES

CHOICES

This morning and as I type this Ottawa is in a state of panic, confusion and heartbreak.  There was a shooting at about 9:50 this morning at the war memorial downtown by parliament.  A man walked up to a soldier and shot him with a rifle, then fled (this soldier has since passed away).  There were shots fired at parliament, around rideau shopping center and other places.  The news reports at this time are a little sketchy and pieced together, but police consider this an active situation and buildings, schools and parliament are all on lock down. 

I was listening to the radio when I heard the breaking news and driving home from Costco, instantly a panicked feeling hit me, we have so many friends who's husbands work for the government, us embassy or military.  It makes me want to gather my little family, and our friends hunker down in our home, play some old fashioned board games, eat some comfort food (soup comes to mind) start the fireplace and forget about this crazy, awful day. 

 Why do people do things like this? Why is someone now left without a dad, brother, husband, father because of someone's horrible decision and choice? What has gone so wrong in this fellow/fellows life to warrant killing another human being? What does he think he is proving or demonstrating? Why was someones last kiss goodbye and wave today? Everyone has their free agency but it is sometimes so hard to understand why someone would use their agency this way.  Surely Heavenly Father is heartbroken as well.  Today I am praying for everyone involved.  For the families of the victims who are now without their loved one and will have to go on without them, to the families of the shooter because their life is forever changed as well. To the shooter and to the Sargent in arms who had to shoot the shooter. For our city that we call home, that we will still see it as beautiful and wonderful and that it will heal from this day.  For me and my little family that we will be kept safe and not live in fear because of someones bad, horrible decisions.  I was surprised at how hard this hit me today, I think because I now have a mother's heart and little's to worry about and want them to live in a world that is peaceful, kind, beautiful and where panic and fear don't grip them. 

The news has also said he has a little boy  that's kindergarten age.  And he himself was 24. My prayer tonight is that his family is comforted, that this will not break them, that they may feel of our Saviours love upholding them and comforting them. That his little boy may be wrapped in love. 

That we remember there are still good salt of the earth people around and here's an example

Great wolf lodge holiday with the McAteers

We were off again to Niagara Falls to enjoy each other's company, not cook meals, no distractions except for water and fun, and the icing on the cake...McAteers. We left Friday and it's always a little stressful getting out the door but a deep breath as soon as we are on the road. As I write this we are on our way back so the craziness and kids going snaky is almost forgotten...almost. That being said we did pass a car and trailer on side of rode in a fiery inferno when we took a picture you could feel the heat of the fire.

So I guess they were having a worse road trip then us. 

Arrived at Great Wolf Lodge around 6, went swimming and then to bed. Spent Saturday in the pool and the weather was phenomenal so we spent most of the day in the outdoor pool. The kids LOVED it and are looking sun kissed. 

Our fun this trip included: 

• Watersliding of course, Mason went down a new slide (Orange) this visit and now a whole new world is opening up to him. Poor Abbie is so anxious to join Mason and Daniela as they waterslide so I took her up, she went down the little slide...loved it and I went to take her again but one of the lifeguards stopped us to tell me she was to little. She was sooooo sad. Lots of swimming outdoors, sun and sliding. 

• Princess Party that Alin suggested I take Daniela too. It was $10 and it was so fun to watch Daniela's reaction and just have some mom and her time.  There was Belle, Elsa, and Snow White. They sang so many songs and really interacted with the kids and then of course a photo op.  Dani was so excited when Snow White waved at her but wanted to stick pretty close to me. Really a fun activity. 

• Trip to town to see the Falls

At Niagara Falls

Love this picture: Daniela, Abbie, Eloise, Evie and Mason. 

I love how every season they decorate. So here was some fall decorations and our crew In front of Great Wolf Lodge. 

The McAteers; Dan, baby Arthur, Evie, Eloise and Kate

I can't say it enough such a great family and we love travelling with them. I had one of the best laughs with snorts and tears included with Kate. We decided we would try and watch women's conference together, so we headed to the gym got on some crazy treadmills that didn't seem to be working normally and started to watch. When out of the corner of my eye I saw Kate trying to adjust something on the iPad that was leaning against the control panel, but it must've put pressure on the speed up button and honestly all I saw was some arm flailing and quick motion while hearing some quick stepping, and then Kate was gone, It was so fast and furious and surprising that I couldn't help but start laughing and I must have been in one of those moods because I couldn't stop and it turned into one of those laughs that tears are running down your face you have to bend over in fear of your 3 baby bladder giving out on you and I topped it off with some snorting. 

• We also went for a little stroll one afternoon and ended at the whirlpools, Dani fell asleep in the stroller and so I took Abbie and went across the trolley above the whirlpool (Alin and Mason were not excited about it at all due to heights)

Abbie and I on the trolley

• We also did some bowling, mini golf, arcade (those dads love the arcade) and of course ate some great food. The kids slept great and another great adventure had:)

First night away...without bringing a baby home

I was nervous, stressed, dripping with sweat, anxious but also needing the chance to try being without my babes and my love for a night.  Not going to lie the thing I was looking forward to the most was uninterrupted sleep. Just for your information I haven't slept more than 3 hours in a row since Mason was born (that's 4.5 years) I could honestly envision my head hitting the pillow, drool running down my cheek and the occasional  snore escaping my throat. If that's a awful picture in your mind, to me it sounded like heaven. 

This is me, in a car (BMW) to be exact, with my new haircut...which I absolutely love, singing at the top of my lungs along with Pink and enjoying the beautiful scenery. The drive to Mont Tremblant was amazingly beautiful, the leaves were beautiful and the smell of fall in the air was delicious. 

Here's the crew that went: Bianca (she is living with the Zimmermans and is from Brazil), Michelle Laycock, ME, Amanda Dugan (pregnant with twins), Elizabeth Du Guilo and Amy Zimmerman. Really amazing group of ladies. It was stunning and beautiful on Friday night. I got there late after everyone else so I just caught a bit of shopping and dinner. I ate my whole meal without anyone spilling on me, putting their hands down my shirt, having to go to the washroom with a little.  I had a conversation from start to finish. All things you don't appreciate when your not a mom:) then back to the room and visited till around midnight. Most important news was I slept from midnight to 7 and only woke up twice thinking something must be wrong with the love bugs, because no one was up and then I remembered and stretched out in my bed and fell back asleep:)

The next day was rainy but I wanted to go up the gondola. It was chilly, and blowing but I loved it. 

So it was Elizabeth, Amy and me while Amanda got her yoga on, Michelle and Bianca where also chilling at the hotel room, then another walk about, lunch and then headed home

The gang

I had to snap this picture I just thought this was so beautiful. 

I have a secret Sept 16,2014

I hear almost daily from people, that they are amazed at how much I do with you kiddos. That we are always out and about and doing things like apple picking, little hikes or a plethora of other adventures to hosting fun little parties, to having our own little school with crafts BUT here's my secret...I am scared to death that I won't always be able to do fun active things with you, I aim to, I hope to and I'm working hard to be healthy but the downside of having kids late in life is that I'm no spring chicken and that scares me to no end. I want to be the mom that is always active with her kids, I want to hike and rock climb and ride bikes and do all those things and let's face it no one wants to get old. I am scared that I'm not going to see you graduate and be that mom

In the crowd fist pumping as you guys walk across the stage. I'm scared  I won't be there for your first loves, marriages, babies or if I am then I'm going to be out of energy, in a body and mind that's failing me.  So while I'm somewhat with it now... most days.   You can bet your bottom dollar that I am going to walk your socks off, make you hike hills, eat snow, try and teach you how amazing and beautiful nature is. That it renews, refreshes and relaxes the soul. Try and enjoy every little exhausting, wonderful, learning, fun moment with you and watch how amazing you three little beings are. I love you "this much", sweet dreams. And here's to a million and more adventures

Aug 15, 2014 Monday

Today's adventures

The progression of a hug 💗 Daniela and Abbie

This picture cracks me up. Mason was thinking they could move it. He was barking orders. Dani was supposed to be pulling and Abbie was helping him push. Honestly though the way he was talking to them and trying to figure it out was so funny. 

I love this picture of Dani. More pumpkin fun. 

Manotick mill

Then home, the usual mom stuff, and for family home evening Alin taught the lesson on healthy bodies and we all did 10 push-ups and 10 sit-ups. 

Aug 8-13 Cabin with the Cappuccino's

We were super lucky and our friends the Cappuccino's invited us to go to a cabin with them for a week.  It was at Lac Serpent on the Quebec side. It was a little of a drive, no cell service (for the boys this was super tough) beautiful beach and a great mini holiday! We spent most of our days on the beach that was amazing, the water was warm and shallow for quite a while. Which is wonderful when you are watching kids. They loved the water and the sand. And the sun

The only downside was it started pouring  on Tuesday and wasn't going to let up. So we ended up going home early on Wednesday. 

Why I need Sundays

Sometimes in the craziness of the moment getting ready for church is a struggle, getting here is a struggle, sitting thru Sacrament is a struggle with our 3 busy littles  BUT then there are slivers of peace and inspiration that are needed in my life.  

The opening song we sang in Relief Society was Did You Think To Pray? 

1. Ere you left your room this morning,

Did you think to pray?

In the name of Christ, our Savior,

Did you sue for loving favor

As a shield today?

[Chorus]

Oh, how praying rests the weary!

Prayer will change the night to day.

So, when life gets dark and dreary,

Don’t forget to pray.

2. When your heart was filled with anger,

Did you think to pray?

Did you plead for grace, my brother,

That you might forgive another

Who had crossed your way?

[Chorus]

Oh, how praying rests the weary!

Prayer will change the night to day.

So, when life gets dark and dreary,

Don’t forget to pray.

3. When sore trials came upon you,

Did you think to pray?

When your soul was full of sorrow,

Balm of Gilead did you borrow

At the gates of day?

[Chorus]

Oh, how praying rests the weary!

Prayer will change the night to day.

So, when life gets dark and dreary,

Don’t forget to pray.

Text: Mary A. Pepper Kidder, 1820–

Music: William O. Perkins, 1831–1902

Psalm 5:3, 12

Mark 11:24–25

The lines that  stuck out so clearly for me today were when your heart was full of sorrow... I find myself so homesick especially with the kids growing up. I wish we were closer to their cousins, and of course to have my siblings around would be amazing. The kids have such a fun time all together and my family really is some of my best friends. Also sometimes this mom thing is wearing on a mom, the constant worry and teaching and need for patience and forgiveness when patience runs out. I had recently been thinking that going back to work would really be a lot easier and maybe a better solution for her family and the struggles I deal with everyday AND THEN I was handed a reading assignment in class. 

“Find nobility in motherhood and joy in womanhood. 

WOW lesson ment just for me. I could feel tears welling up and a new resolve to find, and enjoy the nobility in motherhood     I always wanted to be a mom and honestly for years it was all I could think about, so now in the craziness and business and stress and fun of it all I need to breathe, and breathe deep and enjoy these moments that I dreamed of for so long. 

 

So when I'm exhausted and frustrated, it's mostly from having unrealistic expectations. Expecting our home to be spic and span, kids that never fight, dishes always done, dinner cooking (and everyone enjoying and appreciating it) and time for me to exercise, develop talents, date my husband and do all the other things that I think should just happen in a day is not going to happen at this time of my life. 3 busy, curious, healthy kids and husband are going to have to be my accomplishments of the day. I will however make sure my teeth are brushed everyday!!